Reading Your Lips in the Crowd

With lines from Abdelrahman & Saad Dnewar

I wanted to learn sign language to tell you something

I wanted to learn my mother’s language

I wanted to learn your parents’ language

Iwanted to already come from them

I wanted my mother tongue to be another

I wanted to learn Morse code

I wanted to understand the tapping and tap poems back

I wanted to tell you a stupid secret

on my last day of working at Sue’s

I broke a cup into four pieces,

all different sizes

or another one

one of the last days we still believed in it ~ my dad showed me his old brutalist office ~ the old exam rooms and equipment ~ the placard in which he introduced himself to new patients on the waiting room table ~ one side English in Calibri ~ one side Korean ~ was that the closest I’ll ever get to my dad? ~ telling him I liked his old office, the solid wood, its geometric forms ~ the grief of it all felt so endearing ~ rooms for my grief, finally, to walk in

all four pieces of the cup like a sick bird in my palm


it was already broken, why did it feel so fragile

I remember this very well.

I wanted to learn sign language to tell you something

I wanted to learn my mother’s language

I wanted to learn your parents’ language

I wanted to already come from them

I wanted my mother tongue to be another

I wanted to learn Morse code

I wanted to understand the tapping and tap poems back

I wanted to tell you a stupid secret

on my last day of working at Sue’s

I broke a cup into four pieces,

all different sizes

or another one
one of the last days we still believed in it ~ my dad showed me his old brutalist office ~ the old exam rooms and equipment ~ the placard in which he introduced himself to new patients on the waiting room table ~ one side English in Calibri ~ one side Korean ~ was that the closest I’ll ever get to my dad? ~ telling him I liked his old office, the solid wood, its geometric forms ~ the grief of it all felt so endearing ~ rooms for my grief, finally, to walk in
all four pieces of the cup like a sick bird in my palm

it was already broken, why did it feel so fragile

I remember this very well.

This is the dream you hid from me.

Strange… then why is it happening?

I wanted to learn sign language to tell you something

I wanted to learn my mother’s language

I wanted to learn your parents’ language

I wanted to already come from them

I wanted my mother tongue to be another

I wanted to learn Morse code

I wanted to understand the tapping and tap poems back

I wanted to tell you a stupid secret

on my last day of working at Sue’s

I broke a cup into four pieces,

all different sizes

or another one

one of the last days we still believed in it ~ my dad showed me his old brutalist office ~ the old exam rooms and equipment ~ the placard in which he introduced himself to new patients on the waiting room table ~ one side English in Calibri ~ one side Korean ~ was that the closest I’ll ever get to my dad? ~ telling him I liked his old office, the solid wood, its geometric forms ~ the grief of it all felt so endearing ~rooms for my grief, finally, to walk in

all four pieces of the cup like a sick bird in my palm


it was already broken, why did it feel so fragile

I remember this very well.

This is the dream you hid from me.

Strange… then why is it happening?

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